Tuesday, May 27, 2008;
11:19 PM
hello,im here to blog again.ive gt alot of ups and downs this days.im sad,but im also happy,happy tht i get a cleaer picture of everything.sad tht theres alot of conflicts gng on between us,disappointed tht sth had happend between us,tht some sort distort us or so.conufsed tht i doesnt know wht to do now,to make sure tht everything go bck to the past.
its been 4 days since my best friend leave for beijing.ha!im missing her like hell.
theres alot of things happening nowadays,i need time to recover and to get bck.im sorry if i had hurt you or so,or maybe you wouldnt give a damn to it as well,but im here telling you,youve disappointed me alot,because i trusted you alot in the first place.ha!maybe im just too foolish.
ive nth to say,because i doesnt know wht to do,if you are still thinking abt the problems,be frank and tell me the truth of wht youre thinking,because many people are telling me different stuffs which i doesnt know who to believe at all.
and im disappointed tht you actually left for them,or perhaps you left for them as i ignored all your callings,letters,smses,or so.maybe youre pissed.bt some sort,you shldnt have like tht,idk at all wht you all are thinking.in my point of views,i think we shld sit down and trash everything out.perhaps its the best ways for us.since you left for them,i leave as well,or so.im not quite sure abt it.maybe after awhile,i wld feel btr nd know how to face you all again,now.i doesnt know whos speaking the truth and whos not speaking the truth,i doesnt know how to face you all,i apologise.but ive once tell you,youre my very best friend,and i hope we can be forever.
i need time to cool myself down,idk whn i will think out of the box,or so.bt i will only thn know how to face you guys again.please dont blame sq for everything,because hes innocent,in the first place,i knw abt all this its because ive found out myself and i forced him to say,its not his fault,so dont be mad at him,maybe everyone of us shld think properly abt wht we have done,whether is it correct anot,not abt the bad points but abt everything.yes,think,self reflect.hahaha!
thanks van,beau and alot more for comforting me.ha!im happy abt it,and as well as dawn and sq!ha.
so,ive been attending remedials everyday,wlao,but its fun.haaa!wht a rainy day it is,i was drenched.so this week was a boring week,with remedials and all.
im scare,scare abt tmr stuffs.im scare tht i wld have to go in again,because im having a bad feeling abt the results tmr.im really scare abt tmr.god,save me please,if not,hlp me.i wldnt wanted to go bck in again!it sucks and the feeling is shag.i regreted of wht ive dones in the past alrdy.pls,i doesnt want to go in.everyone pray for me man!